Let’s not burst our kids balloons

Adulthood is getting longer - let kids be kids

Yesterday I posted on Facebook that I wanted my kids to be kids forever. I’ve been a mother for a decade now─and have loved almost every moment of it─and when I look into future and think that in 10 years my youngest child will be finishing high school I want to stop the clock and enjoy their childhood for longer. I know I’ll continue to be a mother beyond childhood and that the next phase will be full of new discoveries, but children are such a special type of people, I’m always amazed at their wit and views of the world and the way they make sense of the crazy and hectic world around them. I want them to live in the fantastic world that they re-invent everyday for longer─ before life starts to become too serious. And I wanted to enjoy my kids in this fantastic world for longer too.

When I look around and see children doing too many afterschool activities, being pressured to excel academically and at sports I often cringe thinking that these kids are being robbed of their childhood. But at the same time, I question if I’m doing enough to give my kids the opportunities they need for future success. I see so many parents stressing out to send their kids to private schools and planning their kids’ busy schedules. I often wonder if this is really necessary.

Then today, suddenly something hit me. We are living so much longer than 50 years ago. A growing number of people are living healthy, active lives well into their eighties. If we are adding years to our adult life shouldn’t we then look at our lives are a whole and really enjoy childhood a little bit longer or at least let kids be kids without rushing them into their adult years. They will have plenty of time to be grown ups. Children born today will have comparatively more years to catch up on anything that society expects of them than their parents had.

My kids, 10 and 7, today asked me if I had any balloons they could play with. I inflated the balloons for them. The neighbours arrived and asked for balloons too. They drew faces in their balloons, gave them names and went outside to play. I thought it was magical to watch kids this age playing with balloons. I don’t want to burst their bubbles anytime soon. I hope that my boys and all children out there are allowed to enjoy their childhood for as long as they can.

Trying to Go Local

The suffering and destruction that go on in the world crush my soul. I tell myself that I am doing my bit to help by trying to be a positive influence to my kids, my family and friends, and sometimes staying sane among the chaos is all I can contribute. But I want to do more.

So today I had an idea. I will try to support different causes this year, not with donations as my resources are limited, but with change in habits and behaviour and will document my solidarity in my blog. This may not produce a huge impact but it’s more than what I have done so far. I will start small: supporting small and local businesses.

When we buy from small businesses we help a sector that employs 70% of the Australian workforce and if the business is local our dollars stay in the community. If you choose goods that are produced locally there is less transport involved so they don’t require as much packaging and petrol which is good for sustainability.

I’ll try my best to do all my shopping the next fortnight from local shops and farmers markets and will be checking where the goods come from before I buy them. As I have not done any planning I am wondering if I will be spending more money than I normally do to run the household. Watch this space to find out.

The ‘Thank You’ Year

In 2015 I’m going to do something I’ve been failing to do for the last 16 years: I’ll be sending out ‘thank you’ notes and birthday cards. I’ve intended to do this since I left Brazil but have always found excuses and then Facebook came along… in recent years I’ve noticed a gradual decline in the number of cards I’ve received. Maybe it’s the law of reciprocity but I truly believe it’s thanks to email and social media.

I’ve gladly welcome social media into my life but I do find that there are gaps that can never be filled by the digital world. Perhaps I’m getting old and nostalgic (I’ve recently watched Jersey Boys and loved it!) but I found the card pictured below at BerkelouW Books and was filled with the desire to write notes to a bunch of special people. Then I realised that I don’t have the mailing address for most of my friends (be warned, I will be asking for your mailing address soon).

Found this gorgeous thank-you card

Now I’ll be busy organising an address book (sounds so passé)... as if I didn’t already have enough on my plate. But it just feels right to work on this project right now.

I also want to put together a soundtrack for these writing moments. Suggestions anyone?

My Laundry Basket is Overflowing

After 3 loads I still have this much to go

I am tired! I didn't bring much from our trip to Brazil but dirty clothes. I couldn't do any washing in Rio so I had a luggage full of dirty clothes. Then I also had to change all the bed linen and dirty towels when we got home.

In addition, Paulo and I spent 3 hours cleaning the house as there was dust everywhere and the bathrooms were filthy. I need a cleaner this year. I survived most of last year without help but I feel it's time to invest in a cleaner again.

I also did a big shopping as both the fridge and pantry were as bare as The Sahara. I can't believe I spent $300 and still didn't buy enough to feed the family for 4 days. Will have to go shopping again on the weekend. I must be doing something wrong or maybe it was the jetleg...

Landing in Australia with Plenty

Exhausted after flying for 19 hours

I know that life cannot be an eternal holiday but one hour away from landing in Sydney, I felt like extending my holidays indefinitely; or just until I got tired of not having professional obligations, until daylight saving was over or until I felt ready to accept my reality again.

But then, following a poor night’s sleep, reality found its way back into my life at 5am with a work trip to Melbourne. The transition from holiday to reality always feels abrupt like a birth - but once the crying is over, I calm down and re-connect with my chaotic everyday. Managing kids, work, a house, marriage and anxiety is full on and many times I wish things were different.

Although every morning I try to recommit to enjoying life as it already is, a few changes would make life more enjoyable, like getting a cleaner for example. But I want to enjoy life even without privileges. My economy class ticket is enough for this moment. I know I landed back in Sydney with plenty.

Bringing Back to Australia a Thing or Two

Our holiday in Brazil is coming to an end. We will leave Recife tomorrow and head to Rio for a few more days then off to Sydney on Sunday. I always feel the blues when the departure date is approaching. There are a few things that I always bring back with me: extra luggage, memories and a hole in the heart.  Leaving the family behind sucks. As I go on with my life I feel that the hole keeps varying in size; most times I'm busy with everyday living so the hole feels small - but it´s always there - until I get together with my family again. That´s my reality; I chose to live overseas. I had to learn to leave with that hole and appreciate it.

As for the extra luggage, we ended up buying an extra suitcase. I didn´t really buy much other than a couple of tops but the kids were given lots of toys and Paulo has truckloads of books and old LP records take to Australia. His mum is trying to get rid of the her son´s junk.

One thing I wish I could take with me is a bit of the local cuisine. Today I made sure I had plenty of corn cake, fish (in passion fruit souce, yum) and other delicacies. I will be surprised if I haven´t put on a kilo or two in this trip.

 

Tomorrow I will try to go for a run by the beach and have my nails and hair done. Women here visit the beauty salon all the time but for me this is luxury. My hair is really dry and more damaged than usual from the sun, beach and pool. See scary photo from a few days ago.

My mum lives 500 metres from the mall, so it´s just a short walk but people around here tend to drive as they are concerned with thieves. Tonight I walked home and it was all good. The streets looked pretty safe.

I will wet my feet at midnight and welcome the new year

Tonight I want to believe in magic. In a few hours I´ll be watching the fireworks at Praia de Boa Viagem. I haven´t stayed up to wait for the new year in a very long time. I don´t really feel the need - it´s not like magic will happen if you wait for the clock to strike midnight. But this year, as I am here with my sibilings, we will walk to the beach together after 11pm and maybe even watch one of the free concerts and do the countdown to midnight.

Final dinner of 2014 - home made pizza 

Our final dinner of 2015 was a banquet of pizza that my brother made for us. I had a special pizza topped with lactose free cottage, sundried tomotoes and rocket. Yumm. My sister prepared the most delicious lactose free desert for me, consisting of home made strawberry ice-cream and sponge cake. I´m full and sleepy and wondering if it´s really worth waiting until midnight...

I am grateful for so much this year but specially for being alive and well and to be living in one of the safest places on earth. Both on christmas day and today, I thought of the mother of three that lost her life at the Lindt Cafe siege in Sydney and how her family must be feeling... life feels so fragile and random and with very few certainties.

So, tonight I want to wet my feet in the water and feel the gentle waves bring positive energy to me and to humanity in 2015 and beyond. I will say a prayer but I´ll not ask for magic to happen. I´ll ask for mindfulness to the world and for contentment; for more being and less doing; for more moments spent in nature and less time in shops. And I will pray that I´ll remember my prayer beyond 1 January. Maybe because I´m writing this down and sharing it, I´ll be more committed.

I´m not a big fan of new years resolutions as such but I will write up a list of things I would like to do or accomplish in 2015. I feel it gives me focus when I write them down. Last year I had ´running two half-marathons´ in my list but I ended up running a full one instead. That was one of the highlights of 2014. I will not write my list on day one as I am not sure yet what I want to get done in 2015. I hope the gentle waves tonight will bring some clarity :)

Another big highlight for me this year was seeing my sister cycling again after fighting breast cancer. The last 2 years so many people I know have been affected by this nasty disease. Seeing good human beeings fighting this type of fight makes me question my beliefs over and over and over.

Ana, you are a warrior, I admire you so much.

My friend Carla, beautiful, she kept sane by reading dozens of books during her treatment.

When we get up tomorrow it will be Thursday like so many other Thrusdays. There will still be wars, and hunger and pain around us. And like everyday there will also be hope and I hope that I remember to savour 2015 one day at a time and honour every moment. This year I failed most days but I will keep trying. New year´s greetings to everyone.